just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
