you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
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