dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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