You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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