i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize