I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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