If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize
