S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize