There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize