He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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