I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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