ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
