why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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