Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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