Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
