This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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