Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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