Where are you?
In a non slutty way
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
