Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize