we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
