your thong is hanging out like whoa
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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