The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
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