Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
