Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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