Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
