My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
only you would photoshop your dick
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
