I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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