4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
