Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize