If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
