it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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