I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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