You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize