I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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