Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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