What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
