RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
