how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Randomize