If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
