The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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