I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
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