we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
