I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
