so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
