I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
