I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize