I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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