Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize