But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
