i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
